Over and over again.
That’s how my days tend to feel.
I do the same things day in and day out with a little bit of change in between.
Yesterday, as I struggled to get many things done within a time period, I couldn’t help but collapse in bed from exhaustion.
I vented to my husband how hard everything seemed to feel in that moment.
“I’m just one person.”
It’s hard being everything each person in our household of 5 (including myself) needs.
One child is sensitive; so I have to remember to tread lightly with her.
My preteen needs guidance and reassurance as she endeavors puberty.
The new addition to our family only wants milk, cuddles, and attention.
And I can’t forget about my marriage.
I take pride in the family my husband and I have created, and want nothing more than to see our relationship continuously flourish.
But where do I fit in all this?
I constantly ask myself this question.
Who is going to take care of me, my needs, wants, and desires?
How do I make sure I am healthy in the midst of what sometimes feel like chaos?
How do I make time for me?
Don’t get me wrong; I love what I do.
I, also, take pride in being the keeper of our home and making sure things run smoothly.
But again, “I’m just one person.”
I need balance.
Sometimes that balance seems impossible to come across.
And in the same breath, sometimes not knowing how or when it will come is comforting.
It reminds me of all the other times I questioned and worried about how something would be resolved or taken care of.
Somehow it always becomes a thing of the past.
Somehow I always find my footing again.
Somehow I regret even worrying in the first place.
Yes, there’s that comfort I’ve been looking for.
Sometimes you have to write things out in order for things to make sense.
My days may be a bit cluttered.
And I may feel like I’m all over the place.
But, I’m reminding myself that things will be okay.
I will find my footing again.
I always do.
One day at a time.